The most common e-mail I receive from clients is about how to continue to lose weight in the midst of the triggers that increase their appetite...
(You can fill in the blanks for yourself...)
I thought I had this losing weight thing figured out. But now my weight is creeping back up, I know my appetite is increasing because of _____________ (family, job or personal stress). It triggers something inside me, I feel like I can't control myself, I'm eating (and/or craving) ______________ (junk, sugary or fatty foods) and all I want to do is EAT! I feel so bad and frustrated with myself. I know you said you don't care what I eat, but I don't want to gain weight. PLEASE HELP!"
You are facing TRIGGERS. Stress is a trigger that increases your appetite and usually increases it for fatty and sugary foods (and unfortunately those are higher in calories). And you're right...no judgment...no judgment at all!
I mean, think about this...
What if a trigger increased your appetite for low calorie salads and fruits and vegetables...how awesome would that be, right?! You'd be chowing down on salads, fruits and veggies, your belly would get full, you'd stay within your caloric budget, not gain weight (maybe even lose weight!), step on the scale, and feel happy! You wouldn't feel bad or sad or discouraged and then you'd keep going happily on your way. Soooo...hmmm...think about it...you wouldn't be wishing you could get control of anything, because you wouldn't feel like anything was out of control. You'd be just fine with how things were unfolding!
Here's a few points I want to share with you. Think about this...
You can't control the triggers. (Stress)
You can't control your reaction to the triggers. (Increased appetite for high calorie foods)
You can however...
Identify the triggers.
You've identified a trigger (or two or three...). Check! √
Now...avoid the trigger(s)...
Oh no! Does that mean you have to choose between your relationships/job/whatever induces stress, and the body you want?
No. The trigger is not technically your relationships or job. The trigger is the stress. That's what you want to avoid. Avoiding stress doesn't happen externally though (you can't control what happens outside of you), it's internal.
So how do you avoid this trigger (as a result of the stress you can't control) internally?
Let's review the truth I constantly preach about the appetite:
The brain controls your appetite. Not you.
How much you desire to eat is controlled by the brain, it's like a light switch. Sometimes it's on, sometimes off, but most of the time, somewhere in between, like a dimmer switch. The brain adjusts it up or down according to your feelings (physical or emotional, the involuntary reactions to your experiences).
We know the process (no judgment, journaling, etc.) decreases it over time.
And there are temporary things that increase it or decrease it immediately: physical feelings like pain and fatigue can spike it, feelings like nausea plummet it.
But what increased your appetite was not a physical feeling, it was an emotional one. Still involuntary... Your feeling of stress was an involuntary reaction to whatever you experienced.
I know, I still haven't told you what you can do to re-gain the control you want. I'm getting to that. I promise! :)
How do you avoid this trigger internally? Especially if the brain is controlling your appetite and you can't?
Here's the answer:
Go one step up higher and more powerful than your brain. Your heart.
The reason the process decreases your appetite over time is because it's honoring and respecting the desire of your heart. The more your heart feels respected and honored, the more powerful it becomes. LOVE grows when watered.
And LOVE is the most powerful energy source of the entire universe.
What is your heart's desire? Do you respect it? Do you want to honor it? Are you worth it?
I can answer the last question for you.... YES!!!!
Restore your heart with LOVE. LOVE is the greatest energy source of the entire universe. It will protect you.
The heart is the only thing that trumps the brain, as the electromagnetic field of the heart is 60 times higher than the electromagnetic field of the brain, and permeates every cell of the body.
The restoration of LOVE will help you deal with whatever triggers you face and equip you to make the decisions you really want to make for weight loss.
You know the way to restore LOVE is to erase the arrows of insult and injury and judgment of any kind...including the ones coming from your own thoughts and feelings about your experience...remove all the guilt, shame, fear, anxiety, etc.
And of course, then, relax. Your desires regarding your weight will come true. I promise. IN DUE TIME. You can't rush it along. Doing so will only increase your appetite. So please, relax. Be kind to yourself. BE PATIENT while you learn a new pattern for dealing with triggers. After all, how many years have you lived in this old one? Give yourself time to learn this new way, this higher way. <3
To learn how we restore the LOVE with The Losing Coach® Process come to our next Workshop or take our Online Course.
Much LOVE to you.... xoxoxo
Shelley Johnson is the Creator & Founder of The Losing Coach®.