I will only speak of this word "excuse" in this blog. I don't allow that judgmental word "excuses" to be spoken in my office when I'm weight loss coaching. Simply because it is filled with so much judgment.
Clients often say under self-condemnation, "I know I have a lot of excuses," to which I say, "No, they sound like valid reasons and/or reactions to me."
If you want to use that word, then, yes, I had "excuses!"
My core had been sliced open four times!! I had children I was taking care of, born prematurely, one with Tourette syndrome, and it wasn't easy.
I needed time to recover. So what if it took over 10 years since my first was born, or 1 year since I was last sliced open, I needed time to recover, okay? Who are you or anyone else to accuse me of having "excuses?"
Yes, damn right, I had valid reasons for all my weight gain. I was hurting. Okay? I was hurting. My core had been violated both physically and emotionally...I felt the deepest pain a mother could feel - that her child's suffering was her fault.
If anyone had come along and said, "No excuses!" to me...the insensitivity would surely have kicked me when I was already down.
Yes, there ARE reasons people gain weight. Valid reasons. Show compassion. And if that person is you... Show compassion to yourself.
The body you see here, has been sliced open four times and her core had been violated. It was 220 lbs at one point.
Then, once I showed compassion to myself, I lost 90 lbs.
Yes excuses!!! Yes! Yes!
Only LOVE and compassion created this body. Not shame, not judgment.
Only LOVE and compassion.
Shelley Johnson is the Creator & Founder of The Losing Coach®.